Friday, November 3, 2017

The artificial intelligence haiku

Stop second guessing
and correcting what I have
to say, you dumbshit.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Notes
Needs to be urgently said before this artificial so-called “intelligence” takes over everything completely. Like Google: “Did you mean ...?” NO, I DEFINITELY DID NOT! STOP QUESTIONING MY INTELLIGENCE, YOU ARTIFICIAL NITWIT and then presenting “sponsored” results I did not ask for.

Stop putting words in my mouth (or under my fingers), Android! You are not even vaguely an android but a stupidly programmed piece of idiocy.

Long live artificial inanity – it shall eventually achieve its ultimate goal: to stop everyone from doing their own thinking.

Sunday, October 22, 2017

The blue Spanish eyes haiku

Actually those
Spanish eyes were more likely
to be brown. Sí, sí.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Woke up with this song coming into my head in a train of thought that started with Frank Sinatra and Nancy Sinatra singing something stupid like I love you, went on to Dean Martin and the Rat Pack (wondering if any of them were still alive), then Al Martino and that one and only song of his I remember.

Friday, October 20, 2017

The 1970s movie title haiku

Dame in a car with
oversized sunglasses and
a loaded shotgun

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 1977)

Note
Movies with similar titles came out in the 1970s in Europe. The dating of the copyright is in synch with the thought and inspiration, not the actual time of writing, which is good old 2017. Picture the sunglasses as similar to those Jackie O. would wear.

Thursday, September 14, 2017

An unpleasant haiku

Approaching my hand
to my nose, I realized 
it smelled like garbage.

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
The truth and nothing but. When that occurred just now, I remembered that I’d taken some plastic trash to the dumpster during the walk I’d just returned from. I must have made contact with the dumpster when throwing the bag in the square hole. Not to worry – I washed my hands thoroughly before writing this down.

Saturday, July 29, 2017

A so what poem

I betrayed the sea
when I pretended
I didn’t want to tame it

– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
More of an illustration or example than a real poem (one that would have come from my heart). What is a so what poem? It is a poem that is based on a preposterous, pretentious assumption, like the one above. Why would anyone in his right mind give a shit about some poet drooling about pretending not to want to tame the sea? Should or would the sea really care? Unfortunately, the genre of so what poems seems to abound and thrive. Particularly on social networks.

Friday, July 21, 2017

A summer visit haiku

Two sultry perfumes
clashing on the sofa and
the fan mixing them.


– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Razor-edge-of-time haiku reporting. The truth and nothing but.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

The Face of an Angel

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WQOPipBdsr4/movieposter.jpg

(a movie one-liner)

A pretentious, bloated piece of not much lost in search of who knows what, just like its cocaine-snorting hero.

Notes
This is about the British film The Face of an Angel (2014), directed by Michael Winterbottom and starring Daniel Brühl, Kate Beckinsale, Valerio Mastandrea and others. It is called a psychological thriller by Wikipedia. However, the thrills are few and far between, and the psychology is mysterious to non-existent. Dante's Beatrice crops up all over as some sort of far-fetched leitmotiv. Only the director and script writer may know why. But hey, it's Italian and Italian world literature and the movie is set in Dante country. If you want to get some relevant information about the real-world murder mystery (Meredith Kercher case of 2007) this is based on, look elsewhere.

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

वैन गो कान से मुकत हो गए

वैन गो कान से मुकत हो गए 

उनको  सुनने की ज़रूरत नहीं थीं :

उन्होंने पहले से ही अपनी दिव्य आवाज को भीतर से सुना

 

अल-माररी को वास्तव में इतना ज़्यादा दिखाई देता 

कि उनको अपनी 

आँखों की ज़रूरत नहीं पड़ी ।   

 

चारेंट्स की कब्र नहीं है 

क्योंकि 

वह हमेशा अमर रहेंगे । 

 

मैं अपने बाएँ हाथ से लोगों का स्वागत करता हूँ 

क्योंकि मैं अपने दाहिने हाथ से 

भगवान को अभिनन्दन कर रहा हूँ । 

 

एडवर्ड हारेंट्स

    

The surreal surprise haiku

Black, black cherries. And
suddenly an eruption
of earwigs, earwigs.


– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
Did not happen quite that way. But I started eating a nectarine when a big earwig fell out of the pit, which had partially split the way it sometimes happens with nectarines. That was surreal enough, actually. But then I thought of a pile of black cherries and discovering, when taking a closer look, that there were masses of earwigs underneath a thin layer of cherries...

Sunday, June 18, 2017

The brutal reality haiku

If it's not fake, it's
most likely war, injustice,
fraud or betrayal.


– Leonard Blumfeld (© 2017)

Note
A somewhat pessimistic view of what’s going on in the world.
What brought that on?
Looking at the news, I suppose, suppressing the few hopeful items that are reported on now and then as well as advertising, which suggests that everything is fun and games if you buy the right products.